What do you wear?

6 10 2010

Let me start of this post by informing you of the recent poll I have been conducting with random friends/acquaintances on undergarments. I’ve talked to men and women about all types of underwear and what types they prefer, colors, etc. Now, before you spout off and call me a pervert, I was simply curious and it has led to some fun conversations about the different types of things we wear to cover our bits and pieces.

For men, it seems there are only a few options. Most men in my peer group go for boxers or go free. The athletic types sometimes wear boxer briefs with a little more support for the boys but on a day-to-day basis: boxers win. No one I talked to likes the mankini or tightie whities, that is so first grade.

Women on the other hand have a lot of options. Now, while I would love to discuss the different varieties that women wear, my main concern is that men don’t know the difference between regular panties and granny panties.

The consensus is (from the men’s side) that anything that covers the cheeks is a grannyP. What!? Obviously the young men of this generation have never seen a grannyP. For you information, bikinis, briefs and boy-shorts styles are NOT granny panties. Sure, they may cover us up, but they are not waist-high and they certainly are not neutral colors and made of silky material like grannies usually are.

If it is colorful, cute, patterned and/or low-rise then it is not a granny. Just sayin’. Chicks wear the cute undies because they are cute and we like it. We wear thongs so our lines don’t show, not to impress you gents (well maybe sometimes it is to impress you).

The reason for this rant? It is to inform all the young men (and I only say young because older gentlemen know better) to never… ever… call a woman’s underwear “granny panties” unless they indeed are grannies.

Now those are some serious grannies...




7 responses

6 10 2010

Haha, this made me smile.

6 10 2010

As the Green Lantern for this space district, it is my duty to browse the Internet for intel. You raise an important question, because I have found that my boxers are really riding up underneath my skin-tight uniform. I can’t go commando. The Guardians won’t have it. (They may be blue, but underneath, I think they’re all Baptists.) Doesn’t surprise me that most young male earthlings prefer boxers, what with their pants on the ground (what else would they wear?) Oh, young lady, don’t ever apologize for asking questions like this — you are exploring the human condition. We monkeys need to stick together. Gotta go now. Flame on….oh, shit, wrong comic…

7 10 2010

GL2814 you raise some excellent points. I would suggest trying some athletic briefs under that uniform to prevent ride up and to make the Guardians pleased (wouldn’t want to tick them off). And are you sure you’re a GL? Sounds more to me like you’re a spy from the Fantastic Four crowd… don’t worry though, I won’t out you. =)

7 10 2010

Thanks for keeping my secret. I’ll try your suggestion. Any idea on where a fellow might purchase asbestos briefs?

7 10 2010

You might want to ask the male readers that Q. =)

8 10 2010

GrannyP’s are also available in cotton. BTW-flabby bottoms should never worry about showing the lines-gross.

7 11 2010

I once threw a pair of gigantic pink grannies with my roommate’s name and phone number out our dorm window to the cheering frats below!

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